243. Chemo 10 how it went

As I mentioned, I was so nervous and couldn't relax at all for this session of chemo. I felt really sick for some reason and still had pain from what felt like a water infection but wasn't. Then I had to have a needle shoved in the hand, which are both pretty sensitive and sore now. They have taken quite a battering from the needles. Diane says that I have done really well, most patients tend to get to this
stage early on and have marks all over their hands, but mine seem pretty unmarked, just tender.

I asked to have a bed to have the chemo today and it was free. So that was a bonus! I was so weak I couldn't hold myself up well. I just flopped and closed my eyes. Diane came over with the drugs, I still had my eyes closed but could hear all the packets being opened and the canula packet tearing open. I tried hard to take deep breaths and relax into it. But feeling as sick as I did, it just couldn't.
Diane couldnt find a vein in my right hand. I was too tender in my left. Eventually she found one. Just under my ring finger. It was pretty high up and I had a horrible feeling it was going to hurt. I tried telling myself it wouldn't. But the needle just felt so big and it pushed right in and stabbed all the way up the vein. I yelped and swore. I jigged my feet and then went quiet. I just remember bursting into tears then. I had taken enough. 3 week of the pain, all the sickness feeling on the last 3 days and then that. Di was great. She understood and was lovely with me.

I calmed down pretty quickly once the drugs had been given and I snoozed through the chemo and people text me and facebooked me in between. Anthony called me which was lovely.
I couldn't face eating as I felt so sick, but I was in between that hunger sickness and pain sickness, where you know you have to eat but can't face it. I managed a small snack which helped.
I drank water but only a bit.

I got some more anti sickness tablets to take as well as the ondansetron. So thats good. Plus some liquid morphine for any bone pain that might occur next week.

2 more to go!!!!!!! TWO!