I was weighed before my chemo at my blood test on Wed and I weigh 90kg = 14.1 stone. That means I have put on about, roughly, 1.5 stone = 21 pounds since starting chemo. I have always fluctuated between 12 and 13 stone for the last 5 years and 12, just under with regular exercise, is my happy weight.
Have chatted to a few close friends about this weight gain in the last few days. All who say I need to focus on beating the cancer and not being hung up about the weight. I think if it didn't make me feel so uncomfortable physically it wouldn't bother no where near as much.
It's the steriods and the whole treatment I have been told.
They are so mean.
Diane my nurse said to me that nearly everyone she sees on ABVD gains weight. When most people think that chemo actually makes you lose weight, I thought it would!
*sigh*
Helen B said to me not to think about what other people think, so did Cher. They're right and I'm only getting my thoughts out by typing, as it helps me so much. I just feel like a total blob. Even my face looks and feels so different and huge. Urgh!
Trying to snap out of it, but it's such a steep learning curve.
I am going to start some yoga next Wed, which will help. But thats small steps between treatments.
Exercise is only an option when I don't feel so low on energy, like last week on the Wii and some of my own yoga. But even then those little bits don't do so much. I have to try and accept this matter don't I. It's taking ages. I'm concious of that and how people keep telling me to stop it, but I'm not listening. I really hope I start to! It's no fun!
I am positive as I can be about everything else but this is where I hit the wall. I feel guilty for being so silly. But it's my emotions. I'm embarrassed. xx
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