I have just been sent an amazing document. That I will probably read again and again over the next few months. Jackie emailed it to me, I met her through facebook. Her son Jamie has been through what I going through and she regularly emails and lets me get stuff off my chest to her.
This document is written by Dr Peter Harvey - a Consultant Clinical Psychologist at Leeds Teaching Hospitals. It is purely about the after treatment time and is a very helpul read that has certainly given me a boost as it said everything that I am thinking, feeling and going through at the moment.
I will more that gladly share it if anyone reading this would like it emailing to them, please get in touch and I will send it on. (It's a nice, lengthy read of 9 pages on PDF)
I finished reading the document and went on the Robert Ogden Macmillan Centre, Leeds, website. I decided I need to book some things to look forward to and to help me to recover well. I have been there for my Look Good Feel Better day back in July. I have had many lovely sessions at Bradford Cancer Support, through my chemotherapy and now am looking for more therapies to experience for recovery of treatment. So I gave them a call. I spoke to a lovely lady called Sadie who booked me in. I have booked a full body massage, reiki session and a colour analysis/make up/make over session where I can take a friend and they can have it done too with me! That session is next Wednesday so it just depends on my car MOT, as it is due then. I need to call them back to confirm later today or tomorrow.
Catherine text me last night to tell me Kirstie Allsop was on Channel 4 and I am so glad she did. I recorded it and watched it early this morning. She was baking!! And entering into baking competitions. She did so well. Next week it's paper crafts. So I need to get on Sky+ and put in the series link. Marks and Spencer do a Kirstie Allsop range, I saw it this morning when I went to get some milk. They sell a beautiful sewing box and other lovely things. Hmmmm!!! :D
I want to go to a place called Scrap Magic, based in Eccleshill, but I don't have any money spare at the moment! grr.. It's so annoying being skint. Recovering from this and being so low on income sucks. It's hard to do anything - So I am just trying to make the most of all my art supplies and try convince my 'wanting to spend' bit of Liz that I have just about enough things here and I don't need anything else really! It's a hard thing to get used to when you are so used to being able to buy things and have spending and going out money. It's quite a trapping feeling - that's why I am SOOO grateful for what The Willow Foundation are doing for us. Paying for the 2 night stay and the petrol. It will be a total treat for us as we are so used to having to watch every thing that leaves our accounts.
My car MOT is due, my tax and Anthony's tax, so this month is particularly tight! Then in November my wage will stop altogether. We are going to be pulling together every penny Anthony is earning to get ourselves through this. I am in the process of filling a form for a Macmillan Grant - but whether or not I will qualify for it is another thing.
I can't stress how flipping hard it is form filling when you are coping with the effects of chemo. My Mum and Dad came over Tuesday night and Mum had to help me with some other benefit forms - when we sat down to do them I was so grateful she was there. Reading is a simple task, I just can't make head nor tail of the things written on the forms sometimes. Then writing an answer to their long winded questions. It's crazy. It's like when you call places like Job Centre Plus - no one there so far has impressed me to be totally honest. I have a phone call to make to them today or tomorrow and I am dreading it. No one has patience. To find someone who can wait and listen to me at my own speed - getting thoughts out and merely explaining my situation is a challenge! So many things like this people take for granted in their lives. I did. To have the strength to follow things up, have the knowledge and capability to fight your corner and stand up for yourself. Most of the time I end up in tears. They want to speak to me, no one else, so it's not like anyone else can do it for me.
Macmillan thankfully have been wonderful when I call them - mainly because they are specialising in Cancer and people coping with it.
I am aware of how the effects of Cancer can completely change your life. I hope my blog can shed some light on it to you how it has changed my life.
Reading that document by Dr Peter Harvey has really helped me today. Get in touch if you would like to read it - even if you are not suffering from Cancer and chemo.radiotherapy effects - I think it is a great read for my friends and family - so you can understand the rubbish I am going through and the situations I will find myself in over the next months, weeks and days of recovery.................. xx
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